Embrace the Season with Empowerment
When the Holidays Feel Heavy: A Therapist’s Guide to Navigating Seasonal Depression, Emotional Overwhelm, and Winter Transitions
Dear reader,
How are you doing?
And I don’t mean the version you offer at work or at holiday gatherings.
I mean the quieter version of you. The one that carries more than anyone realizes.
The part of you that often feels heavier when winter settles in.
If this season brings anxiety, sadness, overwhelm, loneliness, or a sense of disconnect, I see you. And nothing about your experience means you are doing anything wrong.
Understanding Seasonal Depression
Why Winter Hits So Hard
When the sunlight fades and our days become shorter, our nervous systems react. Michigan winters bring cold, darkness, and long periods of stillness.
Stillness can bring emotions we have been avoiding all year.
Seasonal depression, or Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), is real.
Even without a formal diagnosis, many people experience:
- Lower motivation
- Emotional heaviness
- Irritability or overwhelm
- Feeling less like themselves
- Increased anxiety or intrusive thoughts
- Pressure to perform happiness or gratitude
The Emotional Weight of the Holidays
The holidays tend to highlight contradictions.
You can feel joy and grief at the same time.
You can feel connected and lonely at the same time.
You can feel grateful and overwhelmed at the same time.
So many clients tell me things like:
“I should feel happy. Why do I feel this way”
“I love my family, but I feel overwhelmed”
“Everyone else seems fine. What is wrong with me”
Winter often magnifies stress, old wounds, perfectionism, financial pressure, complicated family relationships, and emotional expectations that feel impossible to meet.
But guess what? Many things can be true at the same time.
You can be happy and disconnected.
It’s possible to feel overwhelmed and grateful.
You can even want to be alone and miss people at the same time.
A helpful first step in noticing and moving through these feelings is by being mindful.
A Mindful Practice to Ground Your Winter Emotions
Here is a gentle practice you can use when the heaviness rises.
It is inspired by the mindfulness and grounding techniques we explore in therapy.
A Two Minute Winter Check in
Sit somewhere warm and quiet.
Place your hand on your chest or stomach.
Breathe in for four and out for six.
Say to yourself:
- I acknowledge that this season affects me.
- It makes sense that I feel different right now.
- My emotions are allowed to shift with the light.
- I do not need to force myself to be okay.
If You Are Feeling Disconnected From Yourself
Winter often brings numbness, shutdown, or a sense of drifting.
This is not a failure. It is protection.
When the world slows down, old emotions rise to the surface.
Try bringing yourself back into your body with small steps:
- Notice your feet on the floor
- Wrap yourself in a warm blanket
- Light a candle and observe the glow
- Stretch and notice each sensation
- Ask yourself what you need right now
If the Holidays Bring Up Family Triggers
Winter often reactivates childhood patterns.
Especially if you grew up in homes where emotions were minimized, achievement was prioritized, or you were taught to be easy and agreeable.
You might find yourself returning to:
- People pleasing
- Old family roles
- Avoidance or emotional shutdown
- Feeling not enough
- Over functioning to maintain peace
This does not mean you are going backward. It means your body is remembering what once kept you safe.
You are allowed to respond differently now.
Try telling yourself:
“I do not need to earn rest or joy”
“My needs matter too”
If You Are Navigating Loneliness or Grief
Winter can intensify loneliness, even when you are surrounded by people.
It can also reactivate grief, both old and new.
Maybe someone is missing this year.
Maybe relationships have shifted.
Maybe you feel unseen or disconnected.
Your grief is allowed here.
Your loneliness is valid.
You do not need to pretend you feel okay to make others comfortable.
Small Daily Supports That Truly Help
These practices are not meant to fix you.
They are meant to support you.
- Light therapy for ten minutes in the morning
- Consistent wake and sleep routines
- Gentle movement to release emotional tension
- Realistic and flexible expectations for yourself
- Warm, comforting spaces that help regulate your nervous system
- One intentional moment of connection each day
Your worth is not measured by your productivity.
Not in winter and not ever.
When It Might Be Time to Reach Out
You do not need to be in crisis to seek support.
Therapy can help you:
- Understand how winter affects your mind and body
- Build grounding tools to navigate seasonal depression
- Explore the emotional patterns that winter brings to the surface
- Develop kinder internal language
- Create a plan that supports you through the colder months
You are not doing life wrong.
You are responding to your environment. And your body is asking for care.
Final Note for your Heart
Dear reader, you are allowed to have a complicated relationship with winter.
You are allowed to need more rest, more gentleness, more support, and more softness. – Animals hibernate in the winter, why can’t we?
You are not alone in this season. Even if it feels that way.
And if you are ready to understand your emotions more deeply or find steadier footing through the next few months, I am here. Truly.
Empowering Optimism Therapy
